February 2025
Issue 227

Who shapes your expectations?

More importantly, who has influenced you to feel the way you do about this holiday, and are you required to think the way someone else tells you to?

This month we're going to look at your expectations from life—specifically where you get them and whether they're helping or hurting you. It's a self-examination most singles never take. We simply go along for years, never questioning our motivating beliefs.

Many forces have made you the way you are, and too often you feel guilt or pain because of some of your harmful assumptions. The good news is you can get rid of those damaging expectations, and there's a straightforward way to do it.

Take a look at who shapes your expectations.

Where do you go for love?

Can you replace the gentle touch
that once set your heart on fire?
Can you forget the easy smile,
and the eyes you learned to admire?

One day you felt incredibly rich,
the next day miserably poor.
From the wealth of being wanted,
to a bond that existed no more.

But there is a love you can go to,
a love unbelievably strong.
A love with the power to save your soul,
a love that never goes wrong.

No, it's not the same as the love you once had.
It's not love of flesh and bone.
But it's a love that can overwhelm,
and will never leave you alone.

This is a love that knows your past,
with all your sins and shame.
This is a love that forgives it all,
and accepts you without blame.

This is a love that's tried and true,
compassion that seeks out the lost.
This is a love made just for you,
that flows down from the Cross.

~ Jack Zavada, www.inspiration-for-singles.com, 2025 ~

The advantages of being single: No, really

Too often we fall into a "glass half empty" mindset because of all the disappointments we experience, but the single life isn't all bad.

When you think about it carefully (as this article does), singleness has some things to actually rejoice about.

Doubt me? Then keep an open mind and check out the advantages of being single.

"What do you do with your hurt?"

You can't ignore it; it won't go away. You can go to a therapist. Sometimes that works and sometimes it doesn't.

If you're a Christian, you go to the Great Physician, Jesus Christ. Hope for Hurting Singles shows you exactly how to do that.

Author Jack Zavada is a lifelong single and a lifelong Christian. For more than 40 years, he went through trial-and-error with his own hurts and confusion. He learned, the hard way, what works and what doesn't. He shares those healing principles with you.

That's why Hope for Hurting Singles is a vital resource. It's practical. It's biblical. It zeroes in on a single person's problems in a way no other book does.

Want proof? Read the entire first chapter, right here for f/ree. If it makes sense to you, order the book for more down-to-earth help.

You've put up with the hurt too long. It's time to get healed.

Hope for Hurting Singles is $10.99 in paperback and $3.99 for the Kindle version.

February QOTM: Did you know this?

When I was young, I thought I should have gotten better treatment in life because I was a Christian. I thought God owed me a happy existence.

My reality clashed with that belief.

Now, at 73, I identify more with the apostle Paul than with the misguided folks sitting in that packed stadium listening to Joel Osteen. What we can count on from God is not health, wealth, and happiness, but His constant presence to get us through our problems and pain.

God will get you through this Valentine's Day, even though your heart may be breaking. He will get you through illness, unemployment, depression, loneliness, and every other struggle you face.

Having Jesus Christ as your Savior gives you the assurance of a pain-f/ree life someday, but not necessarily here and now.

Because adversity with God is always better than prosperity without him.

Shocker: You are precious to God

We can't judge God's love for us by our circumstances. That's one of the hardest lessons to learn in life. In fact, at 73 I still have to relearn it.

If you're disabled, you're precious to God. If you're unemployed, you're precious to God. If you have emotional problems, you're precious to God. And if you're single, like me, you are precious to God too.

Some of my most painful lessons have become my most relevant articles. I think you'll find it worthwhile reading: You are precious to God.

Valentine's Day: Why all the pressure?

If you're in a relationship and you don't get the "right" or "meaningful" gift for your sweetie, you can cut the anger in the air with a knife.

If you're not in a relationship, you immediately assume there's something wrong with you and feel like hiding under the covers all evening.

Who's responsible for all this pressure? And why do we allow ourselves to be danced around like puppets every year?

In 2024, Americans spent over $25 billion on Valentine's Day, according to the National Retail Federation. That, fellow single, is a lot of dough. To get folks to cough up that much cash, the companies that sell Valentine's stuff have to do a ton of advertising, and they have to hammer into people's minds what the "perfect" Valentine's gift/event/getaway should be.

If you thought Christmas carried a load of buying guilt, Valentine's Day makes it look like kids' stuff.

Baked into all this is the belief (subtly instilled by advertisers) that the cost or quality of the gift demonstrates the amount of love behind it. EEEEKKK!! Talk about retail blackmail!

If, like me, you'll be sitting home alone on Valentine's Day, don't panic. And don't be manipulated. What was once an innocent holiday that involved the simple exchange of greeting cards has mutated into a Godzilla monster of expensive expectations.

I may treat myself to a steak or a good book knowing that by the morning of the 15th, my life will return to what passes for normal.

Remember the motto of the British during the German air raids on London during WW II: "Keep calm and carry on."

If you love quotations about love…

If you need a nifty snippet to drop on your Sugarcarcass, try these love quotes for single people.

You'll have to supply your own antacids.

And that, Valentine's Day veteran, is our February Inspire-O-Gram. I hope you found something encouraging, something amusing, and something inspiring. If you'd like to comment on this issue, our secure contact form will direct your email right into my personal inbox. You'll receive a personal reply from me in a few days.

I do enjoy putting these newsletters together and consider it a privilege to share them with you every month. When all is said and done, it's still Jesus Christ who brings meaning and worth to our lives.

Thank God for our gracious Savior. Until March then,

PS: Not a Christian yet? Find out how to become a Christian.