Are you ashamed of your past?

Ashamed of your past? God doesn't want you to keep punishing yourself

Are you ashamed of something you did in your past, even recently?

You should know that this feeling is common. Most of us have done things we regret. If we could, we'd like to go back and change parts of our life.

If you're a Christian, you know the feeling of humiliation after you've sinned. You've broken God's law, and you're mortified about it. That's a good thing. If you felt nothing at all, your conscience would be callused—so hardened you could no longer feel guilt when you did wrong.

If you're not a Christian, don't think you have to clean up your life before coming to Christ. God accepts everyone right where they are, but he loves us too much to leave us there. He will accept you, right now, and start the healing process.

None of us can go back and change the past. Even God can't do that. But with God's help, you can change how you see past events. And more importantly, you can learn from it to make wiser choices in the future.

Living life in forward gear

Constantly revisiting wrongs from your past is like wanting to drive somewhere but never taking your car out of Reverse. You can't make any forward progress.

Some actions we took in the past hurt other people. Some things hurt only ourselves. Sometimes they hurt us and lots of other people around us, and those are the most painful regrets of all.

But a life that constantly dwells on the past is not a productive life. It's a stuck life. It's a life that tries to right wrongs with self-punishment, and that never works.

Even before he created the Universe, God had a plan to deal with human sin. He foresaw everything that would happen and knew we would not be able to keep his laws. When the time was right, he sent his Son Jesus to pay the penalty for our sins.

If you have accepted Christ as your Savior, what's important to remember is that his atoning death on the cross covered your sins past, present, and future. After all, when he died 2,000 years ago, you and all of your sins were in the future.

Ask forgiveness then move on

It's hard to ask other people to forgive you when you have hurt them, but usually that's the only way to move on. If you apologize and they refuse to forgive you, then the responsibility shifts from you to them. You have done all you can.

You should know that some people withhold their forgiveness as a way of getting even. But that hurts them, like a wound that never heals.

Maybe it's too late to apologize for something you're ashamed of, or the other person has died, or it would only make things worse. That happens, and there's not much you can do about it.

Hand-in-hand with accepting God's forgiveness is repentance. Repentance means turning, turning from the wrong path to the right path, and the right path is obeying God. God doesn't expect us to be perfect—only God is perfect—but he does expect us to make an honest effort.

When you slip, and you will slip, you ask forgiveness again, then start over. The Christian life is continual slipping and starting over, but the good news is God has infinite patience with us. When he looks at a Christian, he sees the righteousness of his Son. You're . Period. Case closed.

An equally important step

After you've told God what you're ashamed of and received his forgiveness, then you must forgive yourself. Often that's harder than it sounds, but it is possible if you keep in mind that the Being who controls the universe has already forgiven you.

You'll be tempted to keep bringing the event up. You'll be tempted to doubt God's forgiveness. And most of all, you'll be tempted to keep humiliating yourself over that past event, as a misguided way to punish yourself.

Remember this: Jesus took the punishment for your sins. That's the breathtaking beauty of being his follower. He paid the debt for your sins and mine. He was the spotless sacrifice. He doesn't want you to punish yourself. Be sorry, yes. Repent, yes. But your debt has been cancelled on the cross.

When God forgives you, you're free. He requires nothing more of you, other than that you forgive yourself. God, your wise and loving Father, holds nothing more against you.

Satan, on the other hand, wants to trap you in your past. He knows that if you live there, you won't be able to live in the present. You'll keep beating yourself up, imposing an unnecessary sentence for a crime God has completely pardoned.

When Jesus said on the cross, "It is finished," his redeeming work was accomplished. He did what you and I could never do.

That was a one-time event. Done. Over.

Once God has forgiven you for something you were ashamed of, it's time to move on to the renewed life he has in store for you.

We all stumble. Sometimes we fall and have trouble getting up. The Holy Spirit helps us up every time. We just can't live the Christian life without him.

God doesn't want you to be constantly ashamed of your past. He offers you a way to be healed and move on to happiness and wholeness. I hope that today, right now, you'll take it.

Return to top of ashamed of.